Often our perception of ourselves is thought of in terms of what we lack in personality, looks and accomplishments. Choose not to focus on the negative beliefs you may have about yourself. “As you think, so shall you be,” said William James, philosopher and psychologist. Negative thoughts will manifest into reality; it’s a certainty. Instead focus on the good. Each day acknowledge yourself for the good qualities you have, the good work you do and the goals you have accomplished.  Make it a daily ritual to acknowledge your perceived shortcomings and desire to change, and then accept yourself as you are. Recite daily: “I love and accept myself exactly as I am.”

Whether it’s to go back to college, become an actor, sing the blues or learn to tango, make it happen. You will always regret not having pursued what brings you joy and meaning, and you’ll never know how your life could have been if you had done so.  Do it now!  Don’t wait another minute!

Have you been hurt by someone in the past?  Are you angry with someone right now?  Being angry, bitter, or resentful creates anxiety in life. When we forgive, we don’t condone a behavior rather we make a statement to ourselves: “I don’t want to suffer any more over his or her behavior. This person is who he or she is, and I accept this knowledge.”  Bring yourself to make amends with the person without hurting them. Perhaps write a letter if the person has passed on, or ask to meet them for coffee and talk about how you feel without attacking them personally. Also, forgive yourself for whatever you think you have done wrong or have not done in the past. Have mercy on yourself. Your inner peace is a worthwhile pursuit.

At the end of your life, what would you like people to say about you? What did you accomplish/experience that you would consider made your life a success? Who were you as a person? Were you proud of yourself? Did you make a difference? Did you like yourself? Now create your life’s mission based on your answers. Make it as big as you can imagine. Here are two examples:  “My personal mission is to bring a national consciousness to poverty among children in Africa,” or “My personal mission is to have authentic, loving and lasting relationships with my family and friends.” Make sure that your mission rings true for you, believe it and live by it, wholeheartedly. 

Everyone knows someone who is always late, cancels at the last minute or says he or she will do something and then doesn’t follow through. Perhaps there are times when you say one thing and then do another. What would it be like, though, if you always did what you said you’d do, are early for appointments, drive the speed limit, call when you’re going to be late? You will be perceived as a person who is reliable and honorable. You won’t lose people’s trust, or miss opportunities and your relationships will not suffer. And, most importantly, you will feel good about yourself. Of course, there are times when you just can’t keep a commitment such as if you got a flat tire, or your plane was delayed, or you had a family issue that needed your immediate attention. In these cases, you can simply apologize and then recommit. Remember this: You are your word.

What brings you joy? Is there an activity, or hobby that you’re happy doing? Life can be stressful and busy. Sometimes indulging in a creative pursuit, like painting, cooking, gardening, writing, playing an instrument, can be a nice escape and an aphrodisiac. If you always wanted to take a watercolor painting class, sign-up for one. Many local high schools have continuing education programs with all kinds of fun courses. Or, if you enjoy bowling, research a league you can join. Or, if you always wanted to learn the salsa, take a lesson at a local dance studio. Most first time lessons are free. Why is it important? Life will become more interesting and challenging, and your soul will be enriched.

Sometimes we need to push ourselves beyond our self-imposed limits. This stretches our abilities, enhances our lives and builds our confidence. One of the ways we can do this is by taking on a physical challenge. Perhaps you like to run, play tennis or workout. Set a goal having to do with the activity you like. For example, if you like to run, train for a marathon, maybe the New York marathon! Or maybe you want great abs, biceps or a slim figure. Well, do it! The result will be rewarding and you’ll feel good about yourself.

What’s something you do on a daily basis that if you changed it, you’d feel better about yourself? Are you consistently 10 minutes late for work? Do you eat too many sweets?  Do you return phone calls to friends, but weeks later? Challenge yourself to stop the bad habit.  Think about how good you will feel, and the positive impact it will have on your life once you do.  Kick it to the curb, once and for all! 

How often have you said to yourself, “What if I had done that differently?” or, “How could I have said that?” Guilt has a way of hovering around us like an airplane circling the runway and never landing. Until we deal with it, it’s always there. So how can we deal with it? Ask for forgiveness. We all make mistakes and have regrets. Often our mistakes are great lessons and contribute to our personal growth. We become deeper and more compassionate people. Internationally acclaimed Author and Lecturer Marianne Williamson said in her book, Everyday Grace, “To punish ourselves endlessly for our mistakes is to doubt God’s mercy. And God’s desire is always to heal us, not punish us; to correct our thinking, not make us pay.” Once we confess our troubles to a Higher Power and ask that our wrongs be made right, through forgiveness, we begin again.